Wednesday, November 13, 2013

I want to be your favorite half read book.
where journey with unknown surprises awaits.
a journey that doesn’t really need an end.

I want to be that page you read over, and over again.
as transparency meets cautiousness. 
as fear meets courage and will.
when honesty meets a silent shelter.

I want to be those chapters that move you. 
in an unfamiliar way.
in a new kind of warm, and welcoming ways.

I want to be yours

Saturday, September 14, 2013

In the name of Loaf

And, I will loaf you.
In rye and wrong.
For batter or worse.
Wheat or without dough.

Monday, January 2, 2012

Hello Hallo, 2012!

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness.

I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful, and don’t forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can.

And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.”

(Neil Gaiman's blog)
I found these lines from Jenny Jusuf's blog. 

Let us surprise our 2012 selves, shall we? ;)

Monday, December 26, 2011

fishing and baiting and bla bla bla

she walked. he ran.
she ran. he sprinted.
she attempted to sprint. he paused.
she paused to catch her breath. he took out his hand wanting to touch her.
she stepped back. Not only hesitant, but cautiously thinking.
what’s what, now.. and what’s later?

cycle of uncertainty.
when is the right time to hop two steps forwards and when to take a step backward?
when can we skip all these ‘games’ and move right ahead?
initially played to anticipate future excitement and tinglings.
but when its getting a lil too old, the long and clear lane got foggy.
it’s still long, but nowhere clear.
just. cloudy.

you don’t need no water to be sucked in and engage in them fishing rules.
it's getting pretty tiring, these baiting - fishing - pausing - striking - merging (or, diminishing) cycle going on a loop.

sometimes, when it gets too tiring, one packs her soul, her heart and distorted brain back to where she was.
and where she’d better be. =)

Transparency is prettaay

You’re pretty transparent. 
I know. I soaked myself wet for you to view.
You’re pretty transparent. 
I know you like raindrops. This is my version of dropping just like them. To your arms.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

kala Yin rehat sementara Yang & Yang melebur

Yang muda yang bercinta. Bercinta dengan huruf. Berperang dengan logika. Berbaikan dengan mencintai konteks untaian huruf huruf yg menyatu.

Yang terang yang bersinar. Bersinar ditemani mendung & gelap. Meredup ditutupi sinar lain yg cemburu. Bersinar kembali menembus euphoria sesaat.

Yang pasrah yang terdiam. Terdiam dalam buaian pilihan. Menahan hasrat membelot. Menjerit: hedonisme miring memang absolut.

drafting away

We always meet by the elevator. One heading out and another, about to walk in. Before that double “Hey, neighbour!” line simultaneously blurted out.

This has been going on for years. No numbers exchanged. Coincidental meetings and making plans for future dinners happen right there. In front of the lift.

One might blurt : “Jangan dibuat ribet kalo mau ketemuan doang mah. Minta contact details atau unit number apartemen nya dong.”
...And ruining it?
The element of pleasant surprise. Aren't most of us have tendencies looking forward to it. Embrace the spontaneity or hell, create it!

This is blind dating two point o.
Bukan partner date nya yang buta. Tanggalnya. :D

Saturday, December 10, 2011

You want??

What do you want?

I want you to want it the way I’ve been wanting.
I want one plus one to be one of a kind. I one you & you one me.
I want the world spins with sheepish giggles, looking at us.
I want it all and all means you.
I want the hazy road to clear up and go easy with bumps to close with a We.
I want us to remain being critical beings and question the necessary and yet, never question us once you and me have become, US.
I want the wanting to become primal needing. The want one can’t lives without.

When You think you know lots...

You think it's gonna work out.
Little did you know, work hasn't been going two ways.

You think it's best left unsaid.
Little did you know, micro expressions prove your left eye had given you away.

You think it's all for the better.
Little did you know, all is one and when one is all, it spells b.e.s.t.

You think it's not gonna get you.
Little did you know, getting you has happened, with or without you.

You think it takes one to know one.
Little did you know, it might take one to know, and that certain one will still judge nevertheless.

You think it's nothing but the truth.
Little did you know, half of true was projected as truth.

You think silence is golden.
Little did you know, your golden league believes in silencing the unfavorable-s.

In the end, knowing you don't know that much and all the thinkings have been done all along with limited knowledge, is all to it.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

judging around, diversity theories and justifications

every person has his/her own style and ways of seeing something, anything and everything. its my eyes. its your eyes. who are we to judge?

do i judge? yes, i still do! sometimes in silence. sometimes i blurt it out loud with personal preference of words to clearly indicate. i believe in diversity and the idea of mutual respect to discuss an issue. with different opinions. exchanging *ideas*. not dissing.

Lets get specific with an illustration. Such as: photography. each person has their own ways of viewing something and capture it with different angles so, just because one person states ‘your pictures are less than mediocre”, don’t be offended. many might think the otherwise. :)

now, i’m going to judge. whoever compares and feels their achievement[s] are better than the others? well. lemme ask you. define priorities. are you going to say that your priorities and everyone else you know are the same? are you that certain? gimme a valid reason why.

there are many reasons why quotes like ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’ & ‘everybody has got different somethingsomething-oriented goals’ EXIST.

people talk. people share. people get too engrossed sticking to their opinions, they forget to check dictionary for ‘mindset’. For ‘past’.

Some think those who blurted ‘try walking a mile in my shoes.’ are being defensive. well, read thoroughly. some might be Unjustified alibis. While some are merely stating: “Don’t point fingers because God and the universe don’t even do that. we don’t have THE exact life-lanes.”

when i share or confide in someone, its becoming habitual to end with ‘please stay objective despite my subjective blurting.’

the ugliest truth? many times, i do not just DISagree w/ a statement. i might despise your point of view[s]. [yes, for certain extreme cases]. But, hey! Its your life. Its your thoughts. Its your way of responding to some issues. I might hate your words but i respect you spilling it.

One might call it bi-polar diversity understanding. others might call it realism.
i say: i might not agree but if you ain’t shitting on me, go ahead. Say what you wanna say. freedom of speech and thoughts and perceptions. Anything not offensive and demeaning.

an example: i believe in self mockery. as opposed to insensitive slapstick jokes. i apply that differently. self mockery? i don't mind ppl laugh at me or with me. as long as i ain’t offended.

slapstick jokes? i do that to some people. When what’s supposedly no biggie to my brain equalize to something insensitive to you, i shall apologize. For i wasn’t being sensitive or familiar enough to decipher and get to know your idea of what’s acceptable or not.

yknow what’s the hardest way to say a sorry? a simple sorry sans blablablabla.

one’s brain: “oh, i shall say sorry. but i have got valid reasonings of why i was doing it. lemme justify with my theories.”

again, the theory of diversity barges in. what seems like CONCRETE justifications to a person, it’s given the verdict of: BULLSHIT by other people. the hardest part of saying sorry for myself is to REFRAIN the mouth or the fingers to type more than a simple, direct ‘i am truly sorry.’

for when you feel you’re being misunderstood, you can’t help but wanting to explain the reason WHY.

now, different scenario. ‘getting defensive and bringing in weak argument points’ to justify? imma judge again and say its not worth my time. when i think its not worth my time…
do i tell it right to the person’s face? sometimes i do. sometimes i respond through absolute silence.

if you were to think why am i proclaiming being a believer of diversity and at the same time i admit being judgmental? Ain’t that just another illustration of diversity? In between accepting something as it is or to admit being judgmental? :D


sadeethya: Being judgmental is never a good habit, but admit it sometimes we stereotype people, consciously or unconsciously.

inestjokro: So long as you still have an explanation to each “why so?” question, you’ll be ok.